Episode 135 – Megan – surrogate

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you

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to our podcast series with Surrogacy Australia. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen and in turn for helping us spread awareness and appreciation for surrogacy. I’m your host Anna McKie and these recordings are from a regular webinar series that I run. You can find upcoming dates on our website at surrogacyaustralia.org. During the one hour webinars, I will walk you through the surrogacy process in Australia and you can type in questions for us to answer. My co-hosts have all done surrogacy in Australia

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and they alternate between surrogates, gay dads and straight mums. This episode from my archives was recorded in April 2022 and features surrogate Megan. Megan was a surrogate for Will and David and they previously knew each other with Megan and David being cousins. Throw in a lot of love and time, a supportive husband of Megan’s and this team has a recipe for success. It took three previous embryo transfers for this fourth one to stick.

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with the egg coming from their generous friend Carla. After a long labor that didn’t go completely to plan, surrogate Megan birthed Harrison via C-section on the 23rd of December, 2021. You can hear from one of the dads she carried for, Will, in the next episode, number 136. It was fun to revisit this episode as Megan is bubbly, realistic, and shares some beautiful personal memories of the day of birth. I hope you enjoy this episode.

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We’re going to be joined by Megan now, take you through some of the photos from her journey and hear about how that all happened. So Megan, here’s our first photo and we were talking a bit beforehand. Lots of work, obviously getting up to this point. Tell me who’s in this photo, Megan. All right. So from left to right. So Carla is our egg donor. The tallest one is David, my cousin. The next in the middle in red, we have Will, his husband, myself in the stripy dress and my husband on the end. Beautiful. So George is my husband.

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And how many kids have you and George got? We have four. Four children. So clearly practiced in being pregnant and giving birth.

02:16
Yes. uh

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first time that we got to get back together after we did the initial ultrasound at 19 weeks. So I don’t remember how far I am there. feel like I’m like 26-ish weeks maybe. Um, but yeah, so we hadn’t seen each other for about seven or eight weeks there. Yeah. I’d imagine that most surrogates that think about being surrogates don’t think about COVID when you first think about it. And so you’ve really wanted them to be involved in the pregnancy. So COVID really threw a spanner in the works there, I guess. Yeah. So.

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So like, so I offered when my, so my fourth child was about five months old. So he was born in June in November. We had this conversation where I had offered. I think that was, I think.

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COVID hit, I think it was like March onwards from there. or unless it was the year after, I don’t know, I’m really lost for time now. But basically we sort of, were luckily, we jumped into getting some really early appointments. So, um you know, once we had said, yeah, we’re looking to do this, we managed to get an appointment by February to kick off the process. And then we started trying to get all the egg retriever and stuff in place and then COVID hits and basically

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Basically, we squeeze in the first two transfers that don’t work and then we’re on hold because COVID locked everything out for about, I think it was eight, seven or eight months basically, we lost in time just in that section from COVID. So. Yeah, we could come back. I might do the timeline at the end there to give people a guide for how that long. So through us better in the works indeed.

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some of these bumps and I think that’s how we connected too on Instagram when you you were having the opportunity to educate people and sharing you know your journey here and so was this quite late in pregnancy when they’re did you have a hand in organizing this surprise visit is that right? did so so Carla managed it so you know still navigating uh COVID restrictions there were it was a bit touch and go there uh seeing if she could leave uh Adelaide and come to Sydney for their baby shower we just made out like it just was

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wasn’t coming, you know, it was never on the book and she contacted me privately saying, hey, so I booked a flight, don’t know if it will actually go ahead because of COVID, but if so, can I get picked up?

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So it actually worked out really well for me because so this was quite towards the end of the pregnancy. It was actually my last week of work. We wanted to do like a work lunch, you know, for Christmas because we would do the end of December. So I think this was around just close to the first week of December. So I must have been about 36 weeks here. I drove into North Sydney, went to work for a day and left early to pick her up from the airport and told the boys I was coming over at night just to drop off stuff for the party the next day.

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but I brought Carla. What a person, fantastic. And this is it for people listening that are new. This is the joy, it’s the friendship with all of it, isn’t it, that comes with it. And so then I suppose was this a day of birth or is this one of just a day of observations? Yeah, no, this is actually the day of birth. In this photo they had just started, we had to do an induction and this photo is actually really special. So David, every single time we would be like the baby’s moving and David would touch

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so my cousin David would touch my belly the baby did not move every single time so this is actually the first time he felt Harrison move in my belly uh

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uh On the day of birth. So yeah, this is a really special photo. You were speaking about having photographers there and I’m pretty sure the boys, I heard them roll their eyes because my husband was supposed to be the photographer who also, he brought the memory chip but forgot the actual GoPro camera that was supposed to be there. So he did take a couple of, he took a lot of photos.

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photos and videos but just with his phone. Oh god yes. Ah husbands yes okay I suppose he had you know lots to organize at home we’ll forgive him but yes clearly there’s a story that he may not even benefit of the doubt there. And then here we go so this was um ended up being a caesarean but um so you’d had some natural births but I think out of your four you’d had one caesarean already? Yeah that’s right so I had three natural births in the beginning my three

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eldest, they’re older, they’re 16, 14 and 11 now. We also have a three year old. So when it came to that last pregnancy that we had, basically my body just didn’t go into labor and my waters had broken and it had just passed too much time and his heart was spiking. So what that meant was is that it wasn’t, although it was an emergency cesarean at the end of the day for that.

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fourth one, it didn’t put me on the no-go zone for going natural after because it actually, like I’ve had three natural births that went perfectly fine. And my longest birth was seven hours and my shortest was an hour and 45 minutes. So, yeah, basically it was just looked at like an anomaly. He looked a bit distressed. It’d been over 20 hours of water was breaking. You know, they said, look, let’s go in for a cesarean. And I said, yes, although it was technically an emergency.

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It may not have been. We thought we’d try to do the induction for Mr Harrison, but just nothing went right. My epidural didn’t work properly, which is the first time I’ve had a proper epidural for a birth. So my first three births were drug free. And I said, yay, last time I’m going to take all the drugs, give them. It didn’t work.

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half my body was numb and the other half was feeling immense pain. And it was not normal or natural pain because Harrison was in the wrong position. So basically his head was drilling into my hip and tearing my hip apart from the inside. By eight hours, the doctor came in and he was like, I’m so sorry to be the bearer of bad news. And we were like, no, you are actually coming.

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Which still took a little while for them to get me into theatre. In hindsight, we probably weren’t so fussed on how the birth was going to be. I know it was me that was like, no, I want to go natural because it’ll be a quicker recovery. My recovery wasn’t as fast with my last son. This caesarean went completely…

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They’d given me an iron infusion two weeks before. So I think that helped with, you know, preparing me for recovery as well. um then on top of that, not actually having a baby to take care of after. So realistically by three weeks later, I was, I was completely normal. You’re your sleep back and you’re not having to look after a newborn. Unlike these lads here. When you look at this photo, what do you think or feel? So I was out in recovery.

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at this point and this is my husband’s great photography actually. For me this, so this was, so my husband had just filmed and taken a whole bunch of photos as Will has walked Harrison up to meet David. You know, my husband’s not in this, I’ll talk about him. He actually said that this is the most um amazing scene he’s ever seen in his life. Seeing Will present Harrison to David just really, really moved my husband. He said it was just,

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unreal moment and he took a couple of photos but I thought this one was for me it’s just my favorite like and as you were showing um earlier in the slides of the other couple and seeing the two dads faces you know that’s exactly what it you know I look at this photo and I say you know when they say it’s a picture says a thousand words like that’s what I see you know in these sorts of photos.

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And a, and a mint sense of pride knowing you did that. created that. No, still see surrogate. See, they brush it off. But it’s interesting that of all, you’re so quick to, brush that off and see here sharing this tonight and the dads are listening and Carla, you’re here too. I didn’t know that. And of all the things that have happened in your journey, one of the ones that has stayed with you is the impact that’s had on your husband because you’ve chosen to do this, but seeing, and he comes along for

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ride. So it must be a pretty special thing when you know that he’s gotten a life-changing moment out of this journey that you’ve all been on. it clearly, know, no one, David for a very long time being your cousin and to be a part of that. that’s, it’s a beautiful description and story that, you know, it has led up to this cuddle here. It’s pretty special stuff. Hey, and then, and this would be some cuddles then. em

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post-birth sometime? Yeah, I don’t know when this was. I think this was just after New Year’s. Well, it had to have been because my mum gave me that dress on Year’s. We were there planting a lemon tree at home. think that was the day. And that’s what it’s about. It’s about continuing the chaps.

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Pretty cute. Yeah. You’re a bit biased, I’d imagine. I know. He’s so beautiful. Like he’s got like this cute little head. Yeah, it’s nice and proportionate. You did that. You did that. Anonymous has asked us, so let’s have a look. You might be able to answer it Megan or maybe I haven’t read it yet. So one question here is you’ve gotten an idea of timeframes for a Victorian journey. It could be similar for all of them. The Anonymous has been told through Monash IVF that there are four counseling sessions for the IP and surrogate separately, plus the independent site group

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you and that this all goes to a patient review board. Maybe shall I add a little bit on that one? We’re in Sydney in New South Wales, so it’s a little bit different, but yeah, we did have quite a few counselling sessions. So there’s always like, there was one with the IVF clinic with their counsellor, and then we had the independent counselling that was individual as a couple, as both couples. So yeah, we had quite a few. Anonymous, it is state by state. So you’re going to have to just go by how it goes. Those guys that I was initially dating,

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before my guys they were in Victoria and so I remember there being lots. wonder if so one of the counselors who’s amazing is Rita Alessi. If anonymous you’re in Victoria it might be her because I know she has a lot of sessions. It’s going to feel like a lot but I have to tell you they’re worth it because like Negan’s team there they didn’t need any ongoing after that. There’s so much to unpack in those questions and yes as a surrogate and IPs it feels like who are all these people to question our right to do this and for the IPs you know challenging us on parenting. That’s not what it’s about it’s about

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How can you manage this journey of four people coming together, four or more, if you’ve got an egg donor too, to have a baby and everything we need to consider. So there’s a lot to unpack. Victoria have an extra step of a patient review board too, once everything’s complete. Megan there on your journey, I’ll just go back to the timeframes there. So from the time when you said you got to having your first transfer, it sounds like you’ve done some things pretty quickly. in mind you had a friendship there. I want to ask you about being offering and then the timeframes it took. Obviously then David growing up was your cousin,

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And then he meets, you know, well, he’s gay or at some point in time he’s got the man of his dreams and then because not for all guys, it’s…

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They don’t necessarily want to have a family and but clearly David did. Was it something you had in the back of your mind or you’d ever said to him as a kid or how did it, was it a surprise to them? Yeah. So, so look with David and I, we’re related through our fathers, their brothers. Unfortunately with David and his mom and dad, they, had divorced when they were young. So we didn’t see them as much because David did live with his mom. I mean, we always knew of them.

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growing up and look more as like adults and things. That’s when we started to sort of see each other. And look, realistically, the conversation about surrogacy started when my daughter was, so my third child was five years old. So she’s 11 now. So when she was about five years old, it was sort of the now or never chat like with my husband, if we wanted a fourth child, I felt like we’d cast our mark because all of our kids are three years apart. So our conversation

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sort of steered around a family situation I guess that we sort of potentially saw and we discussed that you know I said okay well if we’re not gonna have any more kids I don’t know how we must have been watching something that had surrogacy in it and I said I think that I could do that my husband was like I know you could do that you’re that sort of person so we had had this conversation you know five years ago.

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So it was probably about two, two and a half years later, I accidentally had a fourth baby. Sarah gets a previous full-time woman, right? Yes, you know, went overseas, living our best life, come back.

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and then ended up having our fourth child that never should have, would have existed if we weren’t living such a great life. And then basically from, from there, you know, I still hadn’t forgotten, you know, what I had said and, know, and I sort of was like, oh, I guess it was just in the back of my mind. And I had my son in June and it was in November that I had met up with the boys and one of my other cousins who was moving to America. So, um, just randomly, they were having a conversation and mentioned, when we started

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family and I asked, you know, like I was oblivious to the previous conversations because I hadn’t actually seen them all too much, just at like family gatherings, usually at my sister’s house and things. They told me that they were looking into surrogacy overseas and I said, well, why wouldn’t you do it here? And they basically said, because surrogates are hard to find. um And so, yeah, so I was like, well, what if I said I could be a surrogate for you? And then I got yelled at by everyone.

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My cousin who was leaving to America, was like, you gotta take this back.

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I was like, no, was a legitimate offer. Like I’m just like, know like here I am with like, you know, a four or five month old baby, but it is a legitimate offer. you know, said it was like spur of the moment. And cause I think sometimes other, if there’s IPs listening, sometimes women go, I could do that for you, but they’ve never thought about it. Whereas it actually had been a conversation you’ve thought about even many years before after you’re third. So in the conversations then with David and Will as that got unpacked, they realized this was a

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genuine offer. So my question to you is then if that had never happened do you think you would have gone out and found people to be a surrogate for? No I don’t think so because so for me I had a couple of rules that if I was going to be and this was again back

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with that conversation many, many years ago that I had with my husband, I could see myself doing it for someone who was either really, really close friend or family. And the reason for that is, is because again, like we see ourselves as having like, you know, look, I’ve got four kids in general, just busy family, you know, big family. We’re at birthdays. Sometimes we’ve got three birthdays in the same day and we’re constantly on the go doing things. I, I just feel like when it’s a friendship, it would be

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harder to maintain the, yes, I’ll come and see you versus the, when it’s family, we’re like, well, we’ll see you at that like Easter. Like, I’m going to see you. So it just makes that detachment and relationship easier is what I feel. Yeah. And you didn’t have the time.

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to create a new friendship in your life for one thing. And secondly, to know, the beauty of doing it for people that you know from what I hear, but I couldn’t, I didn’t, because nobody needed me. Like I tried to find IPs and nobody at the time needed me. know, I had my gay best friend, but he wasn’t in a position, didn’t have a partner at the time. And I don’t think ever we’ll have kids. But so did that help to imagine what life would look like after surrogacy when you’re like, hmm, when am going to see this baby?

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I’ll see them from time to time at catch-ups because we already catch up. Exactly, it was, look, it’s one of the things that I’ve sort of said to the boys as well along the way. I’m like, don’t ever get offended when I just disappear, you know, because like I’ll be, you know, busy doing my things and, you know, look, I’m going back to work next week. And I’m like, we were supposed to do all these things. And then I, my whole family caught COVID that wiped us out for two weeks of my holidays. And we got stuck in Queensland in the flood. was it.

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this is the problem with having busy lives and you know post-COVID we’re going to like it’s basically we’ve missed so much and I think the boys as well like we’ve missed so much like just in these last two years having to do our events you know in look I don’t know how it’s always been in um Adelaide for you guys but just everywhere across Australia we’ve got all these different rules and I think one of the one of the years for my son’s birthday we had to do it in three birthday nights because we

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needed to invite everybody over on separate days and time. Yeah. So it’s been crazy couple of years. Yeah. And so for us now, we’re like, oh, look, we just want to, when selling comes up and we want to do it, we’re going to do it. And if we don’t want to do it, we don’t want to do it. Cause that’s one thing that we have learned during COVID, slow down. So we’re trying to slow down and yet speed up at the same time. You mentioned you’re going back to work next week. So you, so we are mid April. So that’ll be, and then you birthed end of December. So that’s handy for surrogates to hear that.

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Yes, and for IPs listening too, it is normal for a woman to have maternity leave as a surrogate too. So we’re saying, so some workplaces will have maternity leave already written into their agreements, some will not, but both the surrogate and the intent of parents are entitled to the paid parental leave. So is that something that you said you access? Yeah, so the government paid parental leave was available to myself. The work covered one wasn’t, just because they don’t stipulate the word surrogacy and they base their policy

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around who is the primary caregiver taking care of the baby and as such in a surrogacy agreement they understand that that’s technically not me. So tricky though because I’m just going add for people listening that legally the surrogate is the primary caregiver as well even though because you know her name’s on that first birth certificate so until the new one gets reissued there’s not Medicare for a lot of the IVF that happens you know at this point but there’s some whispers about some things changing hopefully in the future but in terms of paper and to leave that’s the one double dipping.

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So for newbies listening, both the surrogate and the primary caregiver are entitled to the paid parental leave. And also if their workplaces have maternity paternity leave, they’re entitled to that as well. So I’m glad that you’ve taken your extended leave there and had a chance to reconnect with your family. So you had a family holiday planned if not rained. Yeah, rained every day, every day. Basically I had two weeks off.

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prior to the birth. I finished the 10th of December. Harrison was born the 23rd. So exactly two weeks later. And then I had 16 weeks off after. So my leave finishes this Friday and I technically go back to work on Monday, but it’s probably call it a so win-win. uh For my comparison. So I I’m 39 now, but I was, I’ve lost track 37 or something. So I actually had the last has five weeks of pregnancy off before birth.

21:45
as you get older, you know, it gets a harder. But again, you talk to your team about that, don’t you? And you do what you might have done from your previous or see how you’re going. And so there’s no black and white rule, is there? It’s whatever suits your body and your team. Yeah. And look, and I was basically, we knew that the baby, like if they were going to leave me, because I’ve had the cesarean in my previous pregnancy, they told me that I couldn’t go past the 40 week. And this is through public hospital. That was one of the things you mentioned earlier. You know, how do we go about navigating the hospital?

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after you’re pregnant and you’re just a normal person and I go to the hospital. So we managed the pregnancy just through the public system. We found that they were really accommodating, but yeah, they had a couple of rules in place. They weren’t going to let me go past day 40. So I was like, okay, that’s good for me because then I knew I had an end date, full stop, but that was New Year’s. So it actually was us questioning and seeing if they could push it forward a little bit and then do it on Christmas.

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So we managed to get in just they they bumped it back a week and two days earlier so on the 23rd was really good that it all worked out. Yeah and we got to have that time off. I was working from home because of COVID so I could work as long as I could but initially we had that idea that I was going to finish at least three weeks. um

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Yes, Joanne has asked a question in chat and she said, there laws for donor eggs to a surrogate? Does the donor egg also need to be altruistic? I think I understand the question. For example, Megan, you know the answer this when Carla donated, was that altruistic as well? Yes. Yes. so, yeah, and that’s true. So my three egg donations that I’ve done to Joanne. And so yes, a surrogate is able to have donor eggs in her. I’m wondering if you mean

23:34
Does that have to be known donor or anonymous donor? Joanne, so that could be a great question to come back to the IP webinar in a couple of weeks time, but in a nutshell, yes, I need to get up to date on the individual things of every state, but yes, I do know of surrogates who have carried for IPs where the egg was anonymous. So like it was either bought from the World Egg Bank or there is a variety of other places. It’s not very common, but that can be done. Ah, no, from the World Egg Bank, then that would be a commercial donation.

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but that’s been allowed. There’s a team that went through there on Instagram too. It’s Ari’s dad, Josh and Jack, um if anybody follows them, that they went through the World Egg Bank. Joanne, I’m not sure if I fully answered your question there tonight, but I type it in if you need it answered more specifically there. Yep, Joanne’s given me the yes, that’s good. Megan, have you learned anything about yourself in this journey that you didn’t know? That I have no patience for my own children and I definitely don’t want anymore. That’s probably the biggest one.

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Good, you’re so done with newborns. Yeah, no, look newborns are the best part, but having a three-year-old and being pregnant and I’m turning 36, so you know, and that was actually that was one of the other conditions. So as you asked me earlier, you know, who would I have done it for? Well, I had a couple of conditions. So my conditions were would have to be someone very, very close or within my family or as well it would have to be before I was 35, preferably.

25:04
as that, you know, just with life plans, family plans, what do we want to do in our future? We want to travel more, know, post COVID, post war, all of this. So, you know, they just want to throw everything at us. floods here, monsoon weather. Yeah, floods, we’ve seen. Flood estuels, next.

25:23
Yeah, so I did have a couple of those things and I think I’m completely like, if you didn’t know that you were actually really done on having children, I know 100 % that I’m done. Absolutely. Well, that’s great. That’s how you worked at it, just in case you weren’t sure. Just in case.

25:43
And any advice then for either new surrogates or new IPs at the beginning? Any advice for this whole journey? Yeah, I’ve probably got a lot. Look, knowing things about yourself. So, you know, did I learn anything new? uh Look, about my body, I already knew that I was very hormone sensitive. So you mentioned earlier, you know, sometimes they do like, so you went through like a natural cycle.

26:06
whereas though I didn’t. IVF Australia is who we went with and they prefer to basically be in charge of it and to ensure that I was going to ovulate on a day that they wanted me to ovulate. So my issues with that was, is that being that I already knew that I am hormone sensitive. in the past I had learned, so I had a fibroadenoma. So if anyone doesn’t know what that is, that’s a benign tumor that grows in the breath. They’re sometimes called mice tumors, I think. So basically you can either get them

26:36
clusters are singular tumors and I had a singular benign tumor fibroadenoma. Basically what the specialist had said to me was that they actually they feed from hormones so that’s how they develop in your body. So I already knew I was hormone sensitive you know in the past I tried you know the rod and things like that and the pill to prevent myself from uh like for contraception and basically my body then fed from that and caused this benign tumor. So after the answer was is you’re not allowed to take

27:06
any more pills or anything.

27:09
So they’re to be under… That’s a hormone based one. Not ideal for IVF to have to then medicate you. Yeah. So I did know that it was part of their process and we did question it in the beginning and we did let them know that, you know, I was hormone sensitive. But then on top of all of this, I’m also, again, not a normal person and I have a six week cycle, not a 28 day cycle. So which makes it more complicated to follow without the hormones to follow that process. You mentioned things for surrogates to be aware of.

27:39
of, you know, if you have to take medication or even just going and doing blood tests. There were things that I didn’t know when we started preparing and tracking. Yes, so many blood tests. Yeah. So, and for someone like me who has the six week cycle, it wasn’t three blood tests. It was 10.

27:56
So I could do 10 in a row to track and then be ready for a transfer. you know, and that’s a lot because often the blood tests are in the morning as you’re trying to get kids off to school and you to work. And that’s, it’s a heavy burden on families. that? Yeah. Yeah. They all, all the blood tests had to be before, I think eight 30 in the morning. Um, so that they could get the testing back in time by lunchtime to tell me where I was at. He must’ve felt like a pin cushion. Yeah. It was a little embarrassing. Like when we went for.

28:26
um the harmony test so we we did some additional testing um once we were pregnant we went and did the harmony test and that’s a much bigger needle that they give you which was the first harmony test i’ve done um i hadn’t done it with my own children the pathologist was like have you had recent blood tests and i was like no this is just like because i’ve been doing this for two years it’s really horrible

28:49
I’m like I literally have like holes in my arm. Plus they also give blood so you know I’ve done 12 blood donations previously which they told me I had no idea I’ve done that many. um I’ve destroyed them.

29:04
The things that surrogates put themselves through, what do say then for surrogates to speak up or just to ask questions about these cycles then? For me, like as I said, I already knew these things about me. I just didn’t know that it involved more things. My advice is just expect that there’s going to be more things, accept that expectation, I guess. Because yeah, I think I just misunderstood maybe in the beginning because like,

29:33
they give you the general piece of paper but I don’t fit that box of the general person who has one test, two tests, three tests, does a transfer. Again, and then when they explained it to me they were like… uh

29:44
They don’t want to tell you you’re not normal, but I already know you. I’m not normal. Probably I just, I would say just expect these sorts of things. Another thing that they did mention to me was just with like morning sickness and things like that. So they always say that with a surrogacy, like, especially when the DNA is not yours. So we’ve used an egg donor, you know, the sperm is also unknown to my body. Your body reacts in a different way.

30:07
this was my worst of sickness, morning sickness for all of my pregnancies by far. You know, I was sick for a good 14 weeks and they told me to expect the worst and I actually in the end sort of went, I don’t think I was as bad as what they told me I was going to be. So I felt a bit relieved in that sense. Yeah, that’s fair point. Whereas, and you can see Carolyn’s asked too, but whereas for me, um I was fine. So was really lucky. had not the sickness, perhaps a little bit later on had some hip issues, pelvic, you know. Me too.

30:37
instability. I’m broken now. I know right and I’m laughing. Or whatever no SRC shorts I think I had but yeah so all of that and because you’re always older each pregnancy too so yeah it’s a bit hard on your body so yeah so I reckon we might finish up here with Carolyn’s question so um and has any did anything scare you or worry you about? No but just exactly what you said so like I like with my previous pregnancy I did have some hip issues and um like ligament stretching issues and things like that.

31:07
So I did sort of expect those same things. They were a bit worse and they were better at times So the difference was with this final pregnancy And they don’t know whether it is also another thing to do with surrogacy, but I ended up with gestational diabetes This is the first time that I’ve ever had it. So my previous four pregnancies I didn’t they found that a bit odd but in saying that they were like, okay, you’re 35 That’s the only marker you hit it made me really follow my diet So because I was on the diet control

31:37
because of all that hormone inflammation, I had a lot of water weight for that whole two years leading up. Basically I was at my heaviest I’ve ever been. I was very like water weight puffy. And then by the end of that pregnancy, I was one kilo lighter than what we started. So it was all because I ended up just being a baby belly weight and lost all that inflammation like from the rest of my body, which then helped my hip and didn’t, and I didn’t have that.

32:06
pinching sensation or limping, things like that. I do find now I do have a little bit of a, you know, I feel like I’ve got a little bit of a tricky hip since, but you know, we’re only three and a half months post birth. So things are still going back together. Honestly, I feel, I feel great because you know, we’ve had that two years of that hormones and I was, you know, at the worst I felt my body was, I feel better now. So, so yeah, I, I don’t think anything really scared me. As I said, look, I just sort of expected,

32:36
certain things like because I’ve had them before or they told me just just what for this the only thing was when they told me that I had gestational diabetes I was more concerned you know of the effects that it has on the on the baby because they can get like you know a larger stomach and things like that but um in the end uh Harrison was all good so yeah. Perfect and as you say perhaps you know forcing that diet control ended up helping other things too losing all that weight that the hormones had put you on so yeah that’s weird how it

33:06
but it’s amazing you know what surrogates put our bodies through you know to do this for our friends isn’t it that you know might still have a clicky hip and and those things but i had one before so i can’t i can’t say that it’s any it’s not any worse than what it was after my fourth child so so you know again it’s just except the affected yeah it’s a big i mean i know surrogates brush it off but it’s a big physical thing to go through it is so and it doesn’t just end at birth does it as you say that you know there is recovery and just adjusting back to well

33:36
That’s excellent. And well, I’m going to wish you you luck with you going back to work next week and life will get back into a bit more of a pattern and a rhythm there too, won’t it? this, I don’t know how I’m going to wake up early. It’s lovely to have you tonight and to sort of, you know, cap off this, this time of your leave and to reflect on that journey. So I hope you’ve enjoyed the reflecting that we’ve done tonight. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Welcome. Thank you for listening to this episode.

34:03
To see the beautiful images mentioned, head to our YouTube channel to watch the webinar recording. If you’re looking for more support and potentially connecting with a surrogate or intended parents, head to our website surrogacyaustralia.org to check out the resources and to learn more about SASS. Please subscribe to this podcast if you found it valuable and share it with someone so they too can benefit from this conversation. Until next time, welcome to the village.